How Boudoir Gave Me My Confidence Again

What is your name and age?

My name is Jess Comer and I’m 46!

When did you come in for your Boudoir Shoot? What made you decide to book?

I came in for a Boudoir shoot in May 2022.  My partner had been trying for ages to convince me to do a Boudoir shoot as he was always telling me how beautiful I was, but I would always tell him he was lying. I just felt that I never looked good in photos, so I avoided them like the plague and would generally get people to delete any photos they took as well. However, he saw and entered a competition on social media and surprisingly won, so when he told me he had done this I didn’t believe him - until Divine Diva’s were actually on the phone!

Me and my gorgeous partner, Dan.

How did you feel before your Divas Experience?

Before my Divas experience, I was utterly terrified. I absolutely hated having my photo taken, and I couldn't think of anything scarier than being in front of somebody in my underwear. But, my partner was always telling me how beautiful I am, how pretty I am, and I was so desperate just to see a glimpse of what he might see. So through the discovery calls with Jo and Jess, I really wanted to try and push myself, to see myself in a different way and to see if it was even possible for me to feel good. I constantly had the voices in my head going, “no, it won't be possible, you won't ever look good, because you've never looked good.” I was so worried that those beliefs I had would be proven to be true.

Obviously, we have quite in depth phone calls with you before your experience! Do you feel that it was an important part of the photography experience? Do you feel it added to the experience?

I felt the discovery calls were really important, it helped explore what concerns or fears I had.  It was clear immediately that it wasn’t just about taking some nice photos.  It was about helping me see that I was worth something, that I could feel comfortable in my own skin. The calls also helped me feel as relaxed (as possible) in their company and to be able to enjoy the experience fully.  These calls meant that on the day I felt that I knew the team, and also I knew that they were aware of how I was feeling. It meant they knew how to handle me and how to make the experience something really special!

Having a professional makeup artist work with you on the day, do you think this added to the experience, and what did it do for your confidence coming into the shoot ?

Having a professional makeup artist is wonderful. I have no clue how to put on make up or what suits me, so having someone there who knew exactly what to do and how to create a flawless, striking look was amazing. I felt like a million dollars.

A lot of women feel self conscious about having a boudoir experience - knowing what you know now, what would you say to any woman feeling a little self conscious about herself and treating herself to this experience?

Feeling nervous or self-conscious about having a Boudoir experience is entirely normal and completely understandable……I felt exactly the same.  On the lead up to the day, I felt so many emotions; a lot of them were “I can’t do this” and I nearly cancelled several times. However, something stopped me pulling out. I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it and either prove or refute the voices in my head constantly telling me that I wasn’t pretty.  So, I made sure I followed the teams advice and pampered myself on the lead up to it. I got my hair colour topped up, and I had my nails and eyebrows done to make sure I felt as good as I could do on the day. 

So, how did you feel when you arrived?!

When I arrived the team were so lovely it put me completely at ease. The nerves were still there but they were very kind, gentle and took everything slowly and at my own pace. I felt super nervous but everyone was so lovely. The greeting was so warm, so welcoming. Jess and Jo greeted us and made us feel so comfortable. Jesse came out, we had a chat about photos and how it was all going to work, and then I went through and had the most amazing makeover.

What was it like actually being photographed? How did you find the photoshoot itself?

Jesse the photographer was wonderful. He was so kind, respectful and funny; we ended up having a laugh and a joke. It was quite surreal having photos taken but when I was in there I just went with the flow as I felt so comfortable with him. I thought whilst I was there I might as well embrace the experience fully!

We ended up having a real laugh and I even forgot what I was doing! I was buzzing afterwards. I felt such a high from the experience. It was still tinged with a little bit of nervousness but I just felt brilliant having had the experience and just so reassured, so empowered and so encouraged by having these people around you that make you feel amazing. It's so genuine and you have the place to yourself as well. There wasn't anybody that I felt was looking and judging. It was all about me. And that was amazing.

Tell us - what was the moment you saw your photos for the first time like?

So when we went in for the design consultation, you go into this beautiful room with this absolutely ginormous big screen, it’s almost like walking into a cinema! I was extremely nervous, but when they came onto the screen I was blown away. I couldn’t believe that it was actually me.  My partner was with me for the reveal and a few of the photos brought a tear to his eye.  We wanted to buy them all! It was incredible to see myself in that way, to see that, actually, here were some beautiful photos of ME. I never thought it would be possible in a million years.

Confidence is a big thing - in fact it is everything. How has this boudoir experience elevated who you are in different areas of your life - for example has this confidence affected your relationship or your career?

Before my Boudoir experience, I kind of felt like my life was on hold. Everything was kind of wait until after my next diet or wait until I am a specific size. Everything was associated with how I looked. My wedding plans were even on hold. Everything was on hold. I felt pretty rubbish about myself. But this Boudoir experience showed me that, actually, I'm okay as I am, and I need to be happy with who I am. It's all about being confident with who you are. And I may want to look after myself more, be healthier, be better and if that means that I change a little bit, then so be it, but it's about pursuing what makes me happy and healthy. The Diva experience has shown me that I am enough, and I didn’t feel like I was enough, but I am and I will always be grateful for being shown that. My life is not on hold anymore.

And now you have your artwork, your gorgeous wall art, how do you feel every time you look at it?

I feel proud. My artwork is over my bed so it is there for me every day. When I am having a tough day, or doubts creep in my head, I can look it and think “actually I am enough”.  We have also started to plan our wedding now, which I was keeping on “hold” until after my eternal “next diet”, but now I don’t need too. It has also given me the confidence to set myself some goals and work towards them, to make positive changes in my life.

If this experience helped you find part of you that you believe you had lost or maybe felt you had to hide away, which part of you do you believe you have been able to rediscover because of your boudoir experience with us?

After having bowel surgery last year, I was very conscious of my scar, but in my photos I didn’t notice it at all. 

What stood out for you about this experience?

The whole experience was very special from start to finish; it was all stand out.

So many people have said that this is the best money that they have ever spent on themselves - we know we are not cheap, but some times we just need to know that we are worth spoiling outs selves - do you believe that what you received was valuable and thinking about it now and all that this will give you for so many years - do you believe that this was money well spent?

Yes, even though it cost a fair bit, it was so worth it; the quality of the artwork, the photos and the whole experience was worth every penny.   

What would you say to any one considering this experience?

I would just say absolutely do it. You will feel a million dollars. You will get some artwork that will completely blow your mind, that will surpass even your wildest dreams. If you're body confident already, it will help celebrate who you are and what you want to show. If you were like me, where you've got low body-image, low self-confidence, then it will empower you to feel amazing about yourself and show you that you are beautiful and you are worth so much more than the pressure you put on yourself. And, yes, there are other experiences that you can book, but Divine Divas are all about you. They take the time to get to know you, to really get to know you, to understand what concerns you might have, what your goals are, what you want to achieve and they tailor your experience around that. They make the experience so good, so empowering, so lovely. So put aside any fears that you have, any preconceptions that you might have, and push yourself. You never know what you can achieve. And you will be so amazed.

I still can’t believe I had the guts to go topless…