How my Divas Experience Helped Me Go From The Lowest Point In My Life to Being Crowned ‘Ms South East England’
What is your name and age?
My name is Sarah-Jane, but most of my friends and family call me SJ. I am 44... I'll be 45 in June and it kind of feels like a milestone!
Tell us a bit about yourself!
I am firstly a proud Mum of two gorgeous children. I say ‘children’ - my son is 19 and my daughter is 15, but they’ll always be my babies. I work for a charity supporting children and young adults with mental health needs. I am also a qualified Associate Practitioner, training psychotherapeutic Counsellor and certified Life Coach. Life coaching is something that had interested me for years. I have always loved being an advocate for others and helping others be the best they can be. I love to see people succeed and, after overcoming some of my own hurdles, I decided I wanted to make a career of it.
Can you tell us, why did you decide to book your Divine Divas Experience?
It was 2020 and I had not long split from my ex-fiancé only a short time before we were due to be married. I was very ill and had to have major surgery. I had discovered my fiancé was having an affair with one of our staff members at the company we had set up together... I had also been supporting him as I had also discovered he was an alcoholic after finding sprit bottles hidden around the home. I had lost my career, my fiancé and was deathly ill. I was at my lowest point in my life in that moment.
The surgery was seven hours long and I had heard of people not surviving it, so I had written letters to my family and simply hoped for the best. After the surgery my life changed! The debilitating issues I had were gone and I was beginning to feel healthy again, I was beginning to feel like the old me; the me before heartbreak and illness.
I decided to do more of the things I had always wanted to. I spent so much of my life supporting people to do well and further themselves, and some how along the way, I’d forgotten to turn that same energy inwards. I got an amazing personal trainer and went on to lose eight and half stone.
So, when I got the notification about the body confidence shoot for women over 40, I knew it pushed me totally out of my comfort zone but I had to do it. I wanted to see how my new body could look.
Obviously, we have quite in-depth phone calls with you before your experience! Do you feel that it was an important part of the photography experience? Do you feel it added to the experience?
It absolutely did, I was surprised when I arrived because it felt like I already knew Jess and it felt like the rest of the team already knew me because of the conversations we had. It made me feel so comfortable and Neill was even able to pull on some of that information to help me embrace the shoot itself.
Having a professional makeup artist work with you on the day, do you think this added to the experience, and what did it do for your confidence coming into the shoot ??
Absolutely! I don’t wear a lot of make-up, in fact until a few weeks ago I had never even owned an eye shadow! So without my make-up artist I would have looked like a panda with sunburn! Plus, having soemone do your make-up for you makes you feel special and I learnt so many tips that I could then take away with me!
A lot of women feel self conscious about having a boudoir experience - knowing what you know now, what would you say to any woman feeling a little self conscious about herself and treating herself to this experience?
Don’t be!! The team are so professional, but so friendly they almost feel like family. You are treated so well from the first call. I was so so nervous and self-conscious, I am a 40+ woman who's had two children, I have stretch marks and multiple surgery scars… I had so many things playing around my head!
But, strangely that was the reason I wanted to have this Boudoir experience even more. I needed to see if I could still feel attractive. I was made to feel comfortable all the way through. And by the end I wanted to go again!!
What was it like being photographed? How did you find the photoshoot itself?
I felt more confident just after my shoot, I hadn’t even seen the photos at that point! It was so empowering. I didn’t feel like a Mum or a colleague, I was just me, the me I wanted to be. I regret not asking about doing some ideas I had as I could tell they would have been totally respected and worked with but my nerves got the better of me. Neill, my photographer, was amazing, and his direction and ideas were amazing. Everything is discussed prior to it happening, and you are never made to feel uncomfortable in anyway at all.
Did this experience bring out a side of yourself? Did it help you reconnect/celebrate any side of yourself?
I LOVE Wonder Woman and this shoot made me feel like I could be her! It was amazing. I totally started to feel the like the confident woman I know I am in my professional life. I felt completely empowered
Tell us - what was the moment you saw your photos for the first time like?
It was such an amazing experience! Jess was fantastic and didn’t make me feel rushed while I was looking. I was amazed I could look that way!! I wanted them all! I’m pretty sure the words “is that me!?” were uttered. It was emotional... in a great way.
Confidence, self-love and self-appreciation is a big thing - in fact it is everything and SO MUCH has happened since your shoot!! I’m so excited for you to tell everyone so please go for it. What has happened since your confidence boost from your Boudoir experience? What have you been up to?
After the shoot I was taken on by a modelling agency - and I think I would have said no had I not seen the photos Divine Divas had produced! But the whole experience gave me that push I needed to say yes… From there I was put into a modelling competition where I ended up becoming Ms Hampshire!! I was then sponsored to compete in an international pageant where I became Ms South East England! AND I will be competing this August to become Ms Europe!
I have even done a few modelling shoots and extra work. I have seen my face on a billboard in my city for a local advert and I've even been in a music video for Pola & Bryson! Last month I filmed with Sky for the 8th Series of ‘World's Most Evil Killers’ where I am playing the girlfriend of a killer for the documentary program. I have other contracts coming up and have even been asked to walk the runway at London Fashion Week!! I never thought at 44 I would be starting a life as a model!
I still have major nerves and face serious imposter syndrome, but my children encourage it and I am having an amazing time! I am also in the process of starting up my own company and I am looking forward to pushing myself to do many more challenges.
I had some battles to overcome; my children and I have had to move home due to the fact I have been being stalked and harassed by an ex-partner (a man I was with a short time in 2021) and I am dealing with police investigations and trials, but this has just given me more reason to push on, speak out and help other women feel empowered and strong. I am an advocate for Mental Health and Domestic Abuse awareness and work with charities to support this.
I want to use my platform as Ms South East England to do this. I want my children to see that even when you feel like everything is against you, even when you get pushed down, the rise can be so much better and bigger than the fall. And obviously so many of these amazing changes are directly down to Divine Divas and everyone being so amazing.
Would you say the Divas experience you had with us influenced these things happening at all?
Absolutely! With out a doubt if I had not pushed myself to do this and seen the results, I would never have taken that step further, and as I go on I continue to take bigger steps.
What stood out for you about the experience? Did anything surprise you?
All of it! I was amazed how comfortable I felt from the off, everyone is such an expert at what they do.
Obviously we know we’re an investment, but we believe that celebrating yourself is totally an investment worthwhile. Was it money well spent for you?!
Yes! I don’t spend much on myself and after my payout from the business with my ex, I used a little on me! I don’t often but I'm so glad I did.
In years to come, when you look at your artwork, see the woman in your art staring back at yourself, what do you know you will feel?
I feel like she is the start of a whole new chapter of my life, it’s like looking at the first chapter in a picture book. It reminds be to always have that faith in yourself to take the leap.
Give us your best top tip for any future Divas!
Be unapologetically you!! Enjoy it, be brave and you won't regret it.
